the “something seal” visits my “alone place”

meet, "something seal"....i don't think that's his name, but i call him that. we speak almost every day....mostly when i'm in my "alone place", oh something seal, you always make me lol my pants off..........maybe we should call you "sneaky seal" ;).....well played sir...well played

….payback’s a beak!

thug lyfe!

awsm abs… *spoiler: can use to cut cookies too!!

used this for one week straight.......my gut resumed it's epic roundness within minutes....... i now use this as a sort of "cookie cutter" and no! i'm not eating cookies that look like mens' abs.....who do you think i am? silly simon!?!

parenting, you’re doing it wrong….

wth does that girl think she's doing!? only cats drink milk.....cats and men. especially if you want to end up fighting crime like me....that's right! "closing gyms since last year" am i implying that gyms are evil? well you tell me, what rhymes with "gym"?....yes, "jim" and i have NEVer known anyone named "jim" who wasN't evil....so NOW who's the special person.......what? still me?....eff

facebook timeline? no taaanks lady…

dont' believe me? go check out my "awsm blssm" facebook page and let's be "friends"...... but thats it! no further, i'm not doing another one of those online "hey let's meet up and make babies" type things.....learnt my lesson the last time *scratches privates (not the military ones...)

i can has friends? =D

yeah, that's right, i ALREADY have 2 likes... you know what that means?..........seriously do you? i don't know wth THAT meanS!!!!!!.............now go like me*, on facebook!! =D *we're just friends bro!

which star matters most…moist?..no..most

and even the sun isn't doing it for me lately either....but hey, one step at a time i guess

why taxi when u cud ambulance?

lucky for me, i don't believe in walking!....rolling..... driving.....and eating...these are the three main methods of commute for me...the last one gets you an express ride to any hospital in your area =D WIN!

just finished finals beehatches!!!1!!!1

summer courses..... COME AT ME BRO!!!.....actually gimme some time, i need to get my self checked out for problems with my backside ...especially after this last final...still hurts...true story bro :s