and that’s why i don’t have kids…..not that i know about at least…mostly cause i love sleep….and cookies. you know what they say “don’t…….something”…. i dunno what people say i can’t read minds!
you shall not sleep!
Tag Archives: humour
true story bro….everyday…
i feel you bro….not like that though
yeah i hate them too and NO not cause i can’t! this is 2012 i got choices son!…..yeah no, i don’t … my doctor told me to not place extra stress on my already perfect physique….”plum” that’s what guys wanna look like right?
please internet…..please….
…i have work tomorrow morning 😥 on the plus side, i could stay up all night and learn EVERything about everything from always, you know…use the internet for something productive……….yeah i don’t think i’m going in to work tomorrow :p
and yoU should be…………i got nothing
next you’re going to tell me i should be going to the gym…….but i’m not 😉
pfft, who plugs in their phone anymore
it’s no mystery why a guy who spends his days “blogging” is single. but in my case it IS a mystery…”start blogging” they said, “you’ll get all da ladies” they said….. last time i listen to my world of warcraft online friends
…what do you put in ur car?
boooooyaaaaaa!!!!! i wish i could come up with something as awesome as that with my name……. “hey what’s awesome and has 3 legs …. ; )”…what?… “awesome blossom, that’s what!”……what, is he gay or something?…..”no….”….then why does he call himself awesome blossom?……….”………because ….you’re gay!” (…dammit, should registered a less questionable domain name!)
guide to success…..eff minus
here is my guide to becoming successful at EVERYthing …..except anything that yields money or da ladies…… read: story of my life
pfft, i used to DRive the cool kids to school…still do :(
back of the bus?!?!…could it be? am i racist?………..CAPITAL LETTERS TRANSITION!: i usually just get my own bus, the kinds you see at the airport…..with doors that open wide enough for a hippo to pass through!….or just one really hungry hungry ‘blogger’
no, not because they force me to! it’s totally by choice!…..sadly not mine 😦
…..this is a cat
today: a cat stands up on two legs…tomorrow: i stand up!…….gasp! you guys thought i could move around?
well i can, i just choose not to…..because when you have a “gold card” for krispy kreme, they deliver straight to your mouth
me = secret agent
little known fact, this “blogger” is actually a full fledged mercenary……. so if you want someone “wacked off”….HOLLA!!!! …. the only forms of payment i accept are smiles………and donuts……..also i don’t accept smiles
2012: no tv, just holograms
and yet somehow it’s my fault that starbucks just came out with a new fattuccino and some new cakes…….i can’t be held responsible for what i put in my face hole (mouth)…..i blame society!
books? where we’re going we don’t need book
who reads words nowadays any ways? as a matter of fact i don't even like anything that sounds like manual, the name Manuel or the word "annual". (read: i think i have problems)
they’re all growed up now!
ooooo, i see what you did there 😉
phish phone?!?! what sorcery is this?
dammit bear, but down the "dam" phone!.....get it? cause a beaver makes a dam........and because dam you if you don't get it........did you get it now?....ah eff you guys i give up :p
awsm blssm - home of the sarcasmopotamus 